The Creative Industry sold me a lifestyle lie.

8 years ago I entered the creative industry and there was 1 thing that stood out to me. How did these artists become seemingly successful just through looking cool, smoking 🌱 and going to networking events?

I didn't sit right with me because it wasn't f*cking true. But I sure thought that by looking at social media.

After going to dozens of these networking events I started to slowly realise this. A lot of the people there had nothing to show for themselves and were just there to be a part of whatever was going on. The people filling the room (including me) were all sold this lie, that if they just mingle, then they would somehow make it.

And yes networking is important but WHAT ARE YOU NETWORKING FOR, what do you have to show for yourself. Here in Mikey Trapstar's words - “I’m going to go to this dope ass big event,’ but if you ain’t got your shit, you ain’t got no product, there is no networking that is going to save you.”

Okay, so how did the artists that were successful, make it?

There certainly is not one set route, far from it. Yet, there are two main characteristics I have noticed in those who have made it.

A. The artist has a great team that allows them to only focus on what they are good at (photography, set design, music etc)

B. They have mastered the art of Lifestyle Design. - Routine, social circle, research, spirituality etc. They are incredibly good at time delegation.

Most of the successful people I know almost always fall in category A. We humans are social creatures, and work very well in teams. Being pushed by others and accountability are great motivators. But for this to happen - you need years of work, good connections and some genuine luck. (And there is a downside). Many of these successful people do not have their life together, unhealthy addictions, broken relationships and much more haunts them outside of work. But I believe to be really really successful, one needs to focus on B. and master their own lifestyle and then the rest will follow. Because this is not just about work anymore, it is building your work around your life and not the other way around. I find this path a lot more accessible, sustainable and personally more interesting. (and what my newsletter will be focusing on in the upcoming weeks)

How does one do that?

I have been on this journey for the past 3 years. And 3 weeks ago I finally made the jump to move in by myself and start implementing everything I have learned up to this stage into my life. The path is long and I am not qualified to guide anyone past my own point. What I can do is share some of the things that have had the biggest impact on my life so far.

1. Alone focused time. I am overly social by nature, I thrive around people and up until the age of 24 I very much deprived myself of this alone time. But as soon as I started doing it, I felt that I started to grow into the person I've always wanted to be. Putting my phone on airplane mode or using an app blocker such as onesec or Freedom whenever possible. And diving into whatever is important at the time, reading, taking an online course, meditating, journaling, listening to a podcast etc.

   
   

2. Taking mental notes of what I truly enjoy in life. This might seem obvious but I have always thought I had no true "passion ''. I never felt completely in love with what I was doing. And to an extent I still feel that but I have recently learned to become this successful person that I want to be, focusing on the process and not the end goal is way more productive. Taking these mental notes and analysing them allowed me to naturally change directions in life and fill it with more things that I enjoy doing. A side note here - the enjoyment I am talking about is not the type that is followed by regret.

   
   

3. Building boundaries in my life. I cannot emphasise how important this is. Turning my phone off after 9pm so no one can reach me (unless you have the number to my super secret family phone, only for emergencies). Meeting friends only after I have finished my work. Not allowing my girlfriend to WFH at my place. You might think this is unnecessary but it allows me to do my work and then when I am finished, the time I am with her I can be fully present.

   
   

4. To never stop learning and experimenting regardless if it's going to work or not. My biggest strangle hold on my productivity has been perfectionism.
   

   "Sometimes we hide behind our perfectionism to escape fears; fear of failure, fear of judgement, fear of success etc. Perfectionism is the convenient excuse we use to explain why we haven't taken certain plunges or risks yet… “It’s not ready yet”, “still needs fine tuning”. (Emanuel Freer)

   So yeah basically, f*ck being perfect because if something is worth doing it's also worth doing bad until you can make it good. :)

   
   

5. Systems are the new "Motivation". Only a couple of years ago I thought if I wanted to do something, all I had to do was be motivated and have enough will power. Through many failures I realised that this was far from true. Building systems in my life has been potentially the biggest game changer. Instead of going with the motion of life when I lack motivation and will power, I can look at what is next on the system/plan and keep moving in the right direction. For example having a plan on what to do when life goes sideways and derails you from your chosen path. For me this is a simple Back to Basics plan where I spend two days just purely focusing on getting an early night, exercising, eating good food, lots of water and removing as many distractions as possible (deleting social apps, not going to parties etc.)
   
   And if you feel like you don’t have it in you to be this “disciplined” type of person, I will leave you with this quote from the book Atomic Habits.

Thank you for reading my first newsletter. I would love to hear what you thought of it, send me your brutal feedback on email or instagram DMs.

Also most likely this has not gone in your primary email folder so what you can do is, on gmail - literally drag and drop this email in the primary section, a little pop up will come up saying

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Lots of love,

Koko

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